Before Jesus departed from his disciples to go to the cross, he gave them a “new commandment”–”just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”

In 1 Corinthians 13, the apostle Paul states that “love…believes all things, hopes all things.” At the very least, this means that love “gives the benefit of the doubt.” It hopes and believes the best about the object of its love.

If love “hopes all things,” then it is also true that “unlove (hate) assumes the worst, suspects all things.”

Which one characterizes your thoughts of other people?

• When a co-worker snubs you in the hallway: Do you assume he’s angry with you about something? Or do you give him the benefit of the doubt (perhaps, he just got a text from his wife saying their daughter is being rushed to the hospital)?
• When your parents make a decision that you are not in favor of: Do you assume they don’t care about you and didn’t listen to your input? Or, you do you “hope” and “believe” they have carefully weighed the options and are doing what is best for the family?
• When you receive an email or letter with a critical comment or question: Do you assume an angry tone? Or, do you give the benefit of the doubt, that the author is writing in love?

Examples could be multiplied to be as numerous as the situations in your life. But, you get the drift.

A tendency toward gracious assumptions is one mark of a heart that has been reveling the grace of our Lord. A tendency toward uncharitable assumptions is one mark of a person who has forgotten the grace of the Gospel–because they are not secure in the free-grace of Jesus, they must tear down others to justify themselves.

All this came to mind…(wait, why do you assume I wrote this?)…because Kevin DeYoung, author of Just Do Something, recently penned a great article, “Don’t Assume,” offering an extended application of Jesus’ oft-misapplied command, “Judge not, that you be not judged” (Mt 7:1).

Kevin offer the following sample applications:

Don’t assume you know all the facts after hearing one side of the story.

Don’t assume the person is guilty just because strong charges are made against him.

Don’t assume you understand a blogger’s heart after reading one post.

Don’t assume that famous author, preacher, athlete, politician, or local celebrity won’t read what you write and don’t assume they won’t care what you say.

Don’t assume the divorced person is to blame for the divorce.

Don’t assume the single mom isn’t following Jesus.

Don’t assume the guy from the Mission is less of a man or less of a Christian.

Don’t assume the pastor looking for work is a bad pastor.

Don’t assume the church that struggles or fails is a bad church.

Don’t assume you’d be a better mom.

Don’t assume bad kids are the result of bad parents.

Don’t assume your parents are clueless.

Don’t assume everyone should drop everything to attend to your needs, and don’t assume no one will.

Don’t assume the rich are ungenerous.

Don’t assume the poor are lazy.

Don’t assume you know what they are all like after meeting one or two of their kind.

Don’t assume you should read between the lines.

Don’t assume you have interpreted the emotions of the email correctly.

Don’t assume everyone has forgotten about you.

Don’t assume they meant to leave you off the list.

Don’t assume everyone else has a charmed life.

Don’t assume a bad day makes her a bad friend.

Don’t assume the repentance isn’t genuine.

Don’t assume the forgiveness isn’t sincere.

Don’t assume God can’t change you.

Don’t assume God can’t love you.

Don’t assume God can’t love them.

You can read the whole thing here.

For further application, ask yourself the following:

• How is “giving the benefit of the doubt” an act of grace (undeserved favor)?
• Is my “knee-jerk” reaction to others typically love or unlove? (If you’re really brave, ask your spouse or a good friend.)
• Does cynicism meet Paul’s definition of “love?”
• When I speak unloving assumptions to other, how does this compound my sin? How does this train others to think, to love?
• Is there a relationship I have destroyed (or am destroying) through unloving assumptions? If so, what should I do?
• How should I respond when my friend is assuming the worst in others and sharing it with me? Is it love to let it continue?